what year nine has been like so far.
If i'm honest, year nine has been nothing like i thought it would, and even though i thought that i was 100% prepared for this year, i wasn't. The first day of school was perfect (just as i thought it would be) but the second day things started to go downhill. I think it was the fact that i was so excited to go to school or that i hadn't seen anyone for such a long time but that day i started to twitch and stutter. I haven't talked much about the fact that i suffer from anxiety and am a hypochondriac, but i am, so when this happened to me i started to spiral which made me just get worse and worse. That was one of the most difficult and stressful moments of my life. I couldn't concentrate due to the twitching which was caused by the stress and it was all an evil cycle. After many many appointments and exams we found out that it was actually just stress. It all stopped after they told me that i wasn't dying from it (its my natural instinct to think that) but i have carried on stuttering and when i'm nervous i occasionally twitch. Since then my mental health has been a lot better and i've settled in to this new weird way of living (half lockdown but still going to school?). I wouldn't say im at my highest point but i'm definitely not at my worst and i'm eternally grateful for that.
Apart from that whole “situation” theres been a-lot of other things going on but i don't want to make this too long so i'm going to list them in the fastest way possible.
- i got really nervous in all drama classes (which i used to love) because i hadn't performed in so long. It's better now.
- i didn't end up doing the 5 clubs but just two. philosophy and choir which have both been amazing.
- homework has obviously been stressful even more so since yesterday when i realised that were supposed to spend two hours on it.
- i've had a few mental breakdowns
- i've moved house
- and that's it
Thank you for reading this very hectic blog about my life and Byeeeeeee x
